Maybe I can help. Meditation gives peace but for some people it’s only for a short while, especially when you’re stressed out it makes it harder to clean the mind from negative thoughts because you have a lot to think of. You can Find another path to relax like listening to soothing musics, Dennis Kuo’s music has been accompanying me when I’m dealing with difficult subjects, maybe you can give it a try? And You can also try a different posture while you meditate such as lying on your back. For extra relaxation, light up some scented candles and put soothing sounds and just close your eyes. It helps me all the time. I’m sorry if this is not what you meant but If it is, I hope it will help you.
I’m an introvert too! I found meditation really hard at first (and stressful!). With paractice I’ve gotten much better at bringing my thoughts back to my breath even while not meditating. To stop the post meditation analysis I politely thank my thoughts, tell them I am busy and go do something that requires a bit of focus like reading or exercising or breathing or listening to some music (I have been finding that “Chill lo-fi study beats” on YouTube have been really helpful 🙂 With time and practice you can get really good at acknowledging your racing or critical thoughts and look at them without judgement or stress. Then you can analyze yourself more dispassionately. Don’t despair and keep plodding along — you’ll calm your mind eventually. It just takes time and patience and regular practice. No one manages it instantly.
Try adopting a "mantra", which is just a word or short saying you repeat consistently to keep your mind focused when not meditating. Combined with regular meditation, some say it is quite effective.
One of the things I do is immediately change my environment. So the moment negative or anxious feelings are triggered, I make an effort to put my shoes on and go for a walk. This simple act changes your focus and let’s go of the negative self talk. Also, I’ve started to really take note of my triggers. So there are things that set you off… which then make you think a thought which then make you feel bad. Start understanding what your own triggers are. Is it a phone call, a text, a social media site, a thing someone said? Understand your own triggers so you can distance yourself from them and / or control the thought that follows to stop the negative emotional reaction.
Train of thoughts especially centered around self-criticism is one of the worst thing one can do for oneself, and I know this because I also have strong tendency towards it 🙂 Even if one begin with positive criticism toward oneself, most of time it ends with negative side effect. The fact that you have insight of yourself, that you can analyze yourself step by step is a gift. There’re many people go about their days without noticing anything about themselves or others. People with this kind of gift can’t help but analyze because that ability comes naturally, that’s what it means to be “gifted.” So trying to stop thinking or analyzing will make it also very stressful. Instead embrace it by focusing the subject matter towards outside. Instead of focusing individually, like yourself or specific person or a group or an event, focus on the whole of your world and try to see yourself as part of that world and also others you encounter as that part of the world. With this view analyzing can be very useful tool to understand the meaning of anything. So rather than trying to stop analyzing, try to refocus the subject towards world around you and then focus on you as one of the individual who’s part of that world. Meditation will not stop your thoughts but it will keep the thoughts flow like water and you standing in front of that river. You can’t stop the river from flowing but you can stand next to it and watch it flow and see how beautiful and calm the river is…
Self judgment is more damaging than judgment from others. Practice self love by becoming the Curator of your thoughts. Carefully choose the language you chose for yourself and then watch your confidence around others grow!
How long have you been meditating? If this is still a new habit, you need to continue doing so for the changes to appear (I’m assuming the meditation is about affirmations n to stop this self-taking, overthinking, over analyzing habits). This reaction is merely from your body rejecting n protesting changes you’re making (in this case, for the better). Give it some time, try rationalizing this self talks to make you aware this are merely thoughts that won’t make you go anywhere. In time your mind n body will be attune. It’s just a new habit the body trying to get use to
I’m new to meditating but I know you just need to keep practicing, you will get to the point where you will have greater ability to move past this emotions, the self awareness is obviously already happening, just be patient and keep going
Practice makes perfect with meditation. The more (and longer) you can do it the easier it becomes to see thoughts for what they are…just thoughts. Think of them like clouds passing by, sometimes the sky is stormy and sometimes clear. Appreciate when your head is clearer and don’t get caught up in a never-ending cycle when it’s stormy. The fact that you see the bombardment of thoughts is progress in itself! Next time when you get that feeling just think "ah I’m over thinking again" then try and anchor yourself on your breath. Hope this helps.
It’s interesting how when you’re talking to yourself, you percieve it as though you’re talking to an actual person. At least that’s how it sounds according to your question. If that’s the case, I’d say let the conversation go on. Your subconscious mind controls about 90 percent of your total brain function. Think about it, simple things like eating a bowl of cereal aren’t that simple when you take into consideration the amount of coordination it would take between your eyes, and your arms and your hands, and then to twist all those appendages in such a way that it actually scoops up the cereal and then transfers it to your mouth. All the while, you also have to breath (otherwise you’ll die of course). But you don’t think about all those things when you’re actually doing them. They don’t require thinking. The point is: your body, including your mind, knows way more about what you want then that conscious part of you ever could. And it’ll tell you, you just have to listen. Sometimes it’ll make you thirsty, sometimes it’ll put some details into your dream that might seem irrelevant until you think about what it’s trying to show you. So let the conversation go on, and figure out what the main things are that occupy most of that conversation. See if there’s a pattern. Does the conversation include a particular girl/guy? Why does it do that? Do you lack companionship? Is that what you want? Is that what you’re missing? Does your mind keep bringing up embarrassing moments in the past? It looks like you lack some much needed confidence. What should you do about that then? Build up your skills and make yourself impressive I’d say. Let yourself tell you what it thinks it lacks and what it thinks it wants. You’re only talking to yourself. So if you do find out what it is you want, be prepared to negotiate. What is it that you’re willing to do that will put you closer towards that better version of you? Keep it simple, but continue to add on to it once it feels necessary. You don’t have to come out of that conversation totally peaceful, but try and make sure you come out of that conversation with some ambition. Maybe that’ll give you some peace of mind.
Answers reflect the personal experiences of Fabulous community members. They are not medical or professional advice — for guidance about your health, talk to a qualified professional.